WFMW Reverse Edition...Potty Training HELP!
Tuesday, January 5, 2010 at 8:00PM Courtney 
I love the reverse WFMW post, I get some much great advice and today I am in need of it, or I might possibly loss my mind!
Back in June, Avery woke up one morning asking to go on the potty! Amazement came over me as within two days she was running to the bathroom to go potty and poopy! It was simple and she caught on really fast! I was praising the Lord for giving me such an easy thing as I was about to embark on a very hard pregnancy.
Than the month of August hit, B and I were out of town twice, so she stayed with family, family came to town to visit and than we went cross country for a beach trip. All of the sudden she wouldn't just go on the potty unless Brian and I took her into the bathroom. Every once and a while she would complain that it hurt but was better once she was done. I thought nothing of it and thought the traveling was just too much for her.
A few weeks after we got back into a routine things got worse. She still would go pee on the potty if we took her but she also would just do it on herself if B and I were not around to get her to the bathroom. She complained it hurt and no longer would go poopy. I thought maybe something was wrong took her to the pediatrician and everything was fine. She thought maybe Avery was just going through a stage.
Skip to 4 months later as I write this post we are still having major potty training issues. She wears underwear all day long and I take her to the bathroom through out the day. She never tells us that she has to go, she poopy in her pants or will hold till she is in diapers or even a couple of days.
Lord, I promise I try to keep patience as much as possible but I know she knows that she has to go and I am not sure why it is so hard for her now to just go in the bathroom or tell us. We have offered rewards, praise her for every little step she takes but honestly when I see some progress within days she reverts back to going all over herself. I have tried the leave her in a underwear she will not want to wet herself after a couple of days and that is a huge fail. She doesn't seem to mind, she gets cleaned up and goes right on about her day. I have tried putting her potty seat in the room and watching her like a hawk for days, I think I have honestly tried everything. We even have potty books that make flushing sounds, had her beloved bear show her how he potty's and had Santa write her a note!
In 2 months we will have a new baby around and she will turn 3. I want to somewhat get this under control. If anyone has any suggestions I would love to hear them. I might have already tried them but really any advice would be welcomed. I am at the point that even typing this post I am frustrated inside!
Reader Comments (5)
I think holding her poop is a control thing, and I am clueless about how to resolve that. We are lucky that our almost-3-yo has always enjoyed pooping in the potty. She likes to look at it, make others look at it, and then flush it all by herself. This is gross, but maybe if she sees other people's poops in the potty, she will be more likely to want hers there?
As for the rest of it, we had our daughter trained last summer and then suddenly she refused to pee in the potty and cried for a diaper. I decided she'd pee in the potty by prom and to give her the diapers if that's what she needed. At Christmas, she told Santa she wanted a princess potty. She got one and has peed and pooped in it ever since. I don't know if she's really trained or just messing with us again.
The key for this princess potty is a) it's in the living room so she doesn't have to leave the action to pee and b) it plays a song when she puts something in it. I think those two factors have made all the difference. Some folks swear by leaving them in dirty panties (like, make them FEEL how uncomfortable wet or poopy panties are), but it doesn't seem very sanitary to me. It might work for Avery, though.
Ummmm...with 8 children you'd think I'd have this potty training thing down. My almost 3-year-old girl has no interest, no ability, could care less about the potty thing.
I have learned not to stress. I've never had a 4-year-old in diapers (at least during the day). I have had two in diapers almost constantly for 13 years. It's not as bad as it sounds and a whole lot cleaner than poopie panties!
My daughter wasn't day trained until after her 3rd birthday and night trained after her 5th birthday.
Does your daughter have trouble with constipation? This is what kept my daughter from potty training. She'd hold it and become constipated and then it would get very hard and uncomfortable. Often times, we'd have to give her a suppository to get her to go.
I wish I had some advice, but all kids are different.
She stayed with family without you, and RIGHT AFTER THAT she suddenly felt afraid of using the potty alone and complained of pain. This problem may very well be rooted in something that happened to her while you were away--someone shaming her, an injury, even abuse. Don't assume this is a problem of your child's willful behavior. Talk to the family members who were with her and ask them to tell you every detail they can recall about potty-related stuff and private-parts-related stuff like bathing. Was she with any older kids who might have told her something that scared her, like someone who had a urinary tract infection and told her that it hurt to pee? It really sounds to me like something about her time apart from you triggered her difficulties. I hope it's nothing horrible, just a strange little misunderstanding you can clear up so she can get on with being a big sister!
For a while our daughter wouldn't tell us when she needed to go, and it was so frustrating! We eventually resorted to bribery (which i thought I would never do). We told her that if she told us she needed to use the potty, and then something came out in the potty, she would get a piece of chocolate (an M&M, which we kept in a cupboard in the bathroom). It took a couple of days for her to understand that she had to tell us first before she would get the chocolate, but once she caught on, it definitely helped! I increased her fluid intake to increase the amount of bathroom breaks - although it meant more puddles for a while! After she became pretty consistent, it was surprisingly easy to wean her off the treat after a vacation (we didn't bring the M&Ms on vacation).
Now she tells us most times when she needs to use the potty, and can go by herself if she has non-button pants on. She still has the occasional accident when she's busy playing and holds it, though!